Like The Queen
Whatever happens to strike my fancy, but surely some sort of fiber content.


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Saturday, January 31, 2004  

I know I’m in deep trouble when BD starts using Transactional Analysis techniques on me. And he’s been doing it big time for 24 hours - both in dealing with the sister in law and with my parents. I’m ... getting ready to leave it all, but not through the door yet. I suspect it will take several more sessions with DoctorBD.

The crummiest part about all this is that when I step outside of self and look at self I see self abandoning all the healthy good things to do. I’m eating wrong - forgetting to drink water during the day, getting little or no exercise. I’m not thinking through the next steps I should be taking so that suddenly it’s time to do something and I’m not prepared. I’m scared all the time and for god’s sake, scared of what? Scared of failing yet again with those people! This really sucks. BD will say “it’s time your parent starts taking care of your child.” He’s right. So if that is so, why am I going to my folks with LD today? Oh . Yes. To try yet again to convince them to at least move closer into town, where there is public, or even private transportation. Am I wasting my time? Have I failed to gather enough information? Probably. Damn.

I will have to change the name of this blog to Likethementalpatient. Likethewimp. Likethefool.

Just you remember when you’re out there driving today - half the people driving the other cars are my father - and the other half are my mother!

posted by Bess | 7:52 AM